Tuesday, May 8, 2007

Parasite Hilton

I was feeling I little low on Saturday, you know the feeling, drained of energy, with too many things to do and not enough time to get it done. Looking with a touch of despair upon the sadness of the world.
Then I read that Paris Hilton is going to jail and I bucked right up.
Hooray ! I thought, it couldn’t happen to a more deserving woman.
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m no class warrior intent on knocking down the rich and famous just because they are rich and famous.
I’m an educator, and I know of no other person more desperately in need of an education than this young lady.
Judging by the effectiveness of her previous lessons this one will need to be delivered old school. 45 days in the slammer may seem a little harsh for driving while disqualified but its rather light for driving while being a ghastly parasite sucking the life blood out of society.
I’m no thug either, I have no interest in seeing anyone brutalized while in prison, such lessons are rarely effective anyway, I’m an intellectual so I would rather see her totally freaked out. That’s they way to deal with this sort of trouble maker. So rather than pairing her up with a 100 kg gangster cell mate with a sharpen tooth brush and a bad attitude I recommend a different approach.
To reform Paris Hilton I would recommend a cell mate, maybe a burglar maybe a hooker from the other side of the tracks. But make sure she is a talkative one. Let the millionaire heiress socialite celebrity ( are any of those actually jobs ?) hear for 23 hours a day the tales of desperation, poverty, fear and starvation. Picking coins out of the gutter, scraps out of dumpsites and the hard graft needed just to keep body and soul together on the mean streets.

That’s an education